😁 Desi Jugaad Wale Jokes – Hansi Se Full On Jugaad – 05

1.



Santa Subah Subha Doctor Ke Paas Jata Hai Aur Rote Hue Bolta Hai.
Santa: “Dr, Saab Badi Tension Hai, Kal Raat Ladki Ke Saath Sex Kiya Thha Aur Aaj Peshab Hi Nahi Aa Raha Hai” Doctor Ne Check Kiya Aur Gusse Se Bola Doctor: “Bhosdi Ke Pehle Lund Pe Se Condom To Utar Le“

2.



Santa Made Lot Of Money In USA.
Banta Asked: “How?” Santa: “I Made A Cream, When Applied On Penis, It Smells Like Banana and Was A Hit.” Banta Also Went To USA and Made 5 Times Money Than Santa.
Santa Asked: “How?” Banta: “I Also Developed A Cream, When Applied On Banana, It Smells Like Penis“

3.



What Do Santa and Banta Says To Each Other If They Share The Same Girl? Ans: “Assi Tussi Same Pussy, Kabhi Tu Ghussy, Kabhi Mein Ghussy.”

4.



लड़का : मैं प्यार की ऊंचाई औरइश्क़ की
गहराई को देखना औरछूना चाहता हूँ.
लड़की : सीधी तरह क्यों नहीं कहतेकि
अंडरवियर और ब्रा उतार दो

5.



After Sex Girl Apne Boyfriend Pappu Se Puchti Hai.
Girl: “Jaanu Tum Mujhse Shaadi Kab Karoge?” Pappu: “Darling, Do Idli Aur Ek Medu Wada Ke Liye, Koi Pura Hotel Kharidta Hai Kya?“

6.



Santa Ko Thane Mein Laya Gaya, Aur Police Inpector Ke Aage Pesh Kiya Gaya Inspector: “Tumne Is Bechare Bikhari Ko Itna Kyu Maara?” Santa: “Mene Isko Kitni Baar Bola Ki Main Aisa Waisa Aadmi Nahi Hoon, Fir Bhi Sala Bolta Hai, Ek Baar De De Baba“

7.



Pappu: “Mom, Aap Blouse Mein Paise Kyun Rakhti Ho?” Mom: “Taaki Tere Papa Ko Pata Na Chale” Pappu: “Mom Aap Bhi Na, Bechare Papa Roz Kaamwali Ke Blouse Mein Dhoondte Rahte Hai“

8.



Bade Dino Baad Mall Mein Ex Girlfriend Pappu Ko Mili To Usne Pucha “Bahut Dino Baad Mile Ho, Kaisa Hai Aajkal?” Pappu: “Jeans Utar Ke Dekh Le Kaisa Hai Aajkal Pata Lag Jayega”

9.



Santa Doctor Ke Paas Gaya Doctor: “Arrey Waah, Tum Duniya Ke Pehle Aadmi Ho Jo Pregnent Ho” Santa Rote Hue: “Hey Bhagwan! Main Logo Ko Kya Munh Dikhaunga? Meri To Abhi Shadi Bhi Nahi Hu.“

10.



Santa Badi Buri Halat Mein Ghar Aya Sab Ne Pucha: “Kya Hua?” Santa: “Mandi Mein Anaaj Bech Raha Thha Ye Kah Ke Gehoon-Le-Lo” Gharwale: “Fir?” Santa: “Sab Ne Samjha Gay-Hun-Le-Lo, Aur Unhone Meri Mill Ke Li“

11.



Sardar Ji, Aapko Logo Ne Kyun Maara??? Sardar: “Arey Yaar Meri Photo Bus Mein Gir Gayi Thhi, Maine Kaha Madam Zara Saari Upar Karna Maine Photo Lena Hai“

12.



Pappu Ne Apni Nayi Bani Girlfriend Ko Kaha Pappu: “I Have A P.H.D” Ladki Ke To Sun Ke Tote Udd Gaye Aur Boli Ladki: “Really?” Pappu: “Yes, Pretty Huge Dick!“

13.



Santa Ki Shaadi Ke 3 month Baad Hi Beta Ho Gaya.
Santa: “Ye Hamara Bachha 3 month Baad Kaise Ho Gaya? Aur Logo Ka To 9 month Baad Hota Hai?” Biwi: “Aaap Bhi Na..
Ye Batao Aapki Shaadi Ko Kitna Time Hua Hai?” Santa: “3 month” Biwi: “Aur Meri Shaadi Ko?” Santa: “3 month” Biwi: “Aur Hamara Bachcha Kitne Time Baad Hua?” Santa: “3 month Baad” Biwi: “Total Kitne Months Ho Gaye?” Santa Khushi Se: “Oh Shit Yaar, Samay Ka Pata Hi Nhi Chala..
Sorry Janu Mene Tumpar Shak Kiya“

14.



Santa Doctor Ke Paas Gaya Doctor: “Arrey Waah, Tum Duniya Ke Pehle Aadmi Ho Jo Pregnent Ho” Santa Rote Hue: “Hey Bhagwan! Main Logo Ko Kya Munh Dikhaunga? Meri To Abhi Shadi Bhi Nahi Hu.“

15.



Santa: “Madam, How Do Babies Come In To The World?” Teacher: “In The Moonlight Angels Come and Leave The Baby In A Mother’s Lap” Santa: “You Mean Fucking Is Useless“

16.



Santa Enters Home From Work And Seeing Preeto Is Sitting On Sofa In Skirt Not Wearing Panty She Spreads Her Legs.
Santa Stares At The Spot.
Preeto Smiles: “Aise Kya Dekh Rahe Ho, Panty Nahi Pehni Hoon.” Santa: “Ohh Tune To Daraa Hi Diya, Mujhe Laga Sofa Phat Gaya Hai“

17.



Santa Ne Apna Underwear Dhoya Aur Chatt Pe Gaya Sath Wali Padosan Ki Panty Sukh Rahi Thhi Usne Uske Saath Apna Underwear Taanga Uspar Ek Note Likh Diya Aur Khud Chala Gaya “Babhi Please Mera Underwear Bhi Utar Lena Jab Aap Apni Panty Utaaro“

18.



Sardar Ji Ne Ek Din Apne Bete Ko Muth Marte Dekh To Kuch Dino Baad Uski Shadi Ker Di.
Kuch Din Baad Bete Se Pucha: “Beta Ab To Sab Theek Hai Na?” Bete Ne Gusse Se Kaha: “Kya Ghanta Theek Hai Uska Haath To 5 Minute Mein Hi Thak Jata Hai“

19.



A Nigro Man Attended A Night Party Without Dress.
Santa Thought He Was In Black Suit.
He Told Him: “Your Dress Is Nice But Tie Is In Wrong Place“

20.



Hindi Ki Madam Class Mein Bachho Ka Hindi Grammar Ka Oral Test Le Rahi Thi.
Madam: “Saamp Bhi Mar Jaye Aur Lathi Bhi Na Toote – Is Muhavare Ko Ek Shabad Mein Samjhao” Pappu Muskurate Hue Bola: “Mam, Masturbation (Muth)“

21.



Santa Was Asked To Explain “Rape” He Said: “It Is A Very-Very Difficult Job, It Is Something Like Playing Golf With A Moving Hole“

22.



Santa Ko Judwa Bachhe Chahiye Thhe Socho Usne Kya Kiya Sochho Sochho Sochho Sochho Yaar Dimag Lagao Its Very Simple Abe Vo Santa Hai Uski Tarha Soch Na Nahi Samjh Aa Raha, Chalo Mein Bata Deta Hun Usne Condom Ke Ander 2 Hole Kar Diye

23.



Santa Ek Bar Interview Dene Gaya Boss: “What’s Your Wife Name?” Santa: “Sir, Preeto” Boss: “What’s Her Whole Name?” Santa Sochte Hue: “Sir, Hole Ka Naam To Rakha Nahi, Par Main Pyar Se Fuddi Kehta Hoon“

24.



Ek Bar Bahut Bade Hotel Mein Shadi Ho Rahi Thi, Udhar Apne Santa Ji Bhi Masti Maar Rahe The.
Achanak Se Sath Mein Khadi Ek Ladki Ko Toilet Jana Thha Usne Santa Se Puchha.
Ladki: “Sardar Ji, Susu Karne Ki Jagha Dikha Do” Santa Ne Sharamte Hue Jawab Diya: “You Naughty Girl Pahle Tum Dikhao Fir Mein Dikhaunga“

25.



Santa Banta Ek Din Film Se Related Baat Kar Rahe The To Achanak Se Santa Ne Banta Se Puchha.
Santa: “Deepa Mehta Ne Ek Film Lesbeens Par Banayi Naam Rakha Fire Ab Wo Gay Ke Upar Film Bana Rahi Hai Socho Uska Naam Kya Hoga?” Banta: “Pata Nahi” Santa: “Backfire“

26.



Sardar Ji Ki Shadi Hui To First Night Ko Apni Biwi Ki Choo.T Ke Niche Mombatti Jala Ke Beth Gaye Biwi Ne Pucha: “Eh Ki Kar Raye Ho Ji?” Sardar: “Dostaan Ne Keya Si Ke Fud.Di Len To Pehla Garam Kar Layi“

27.



Ek Baar Ek Sardaar Apni Patni Ke Boobs Pakad Kar Bola: “Darling Je Tere Boobs Thodhe Hor Sakhat Hunde Ta Tainu Bra Paaun Di Zarurat Nahi Si” Patni Ne V Sardaar Da Lund Fadd Ke Keya: “Je Tera V Lund Thoda Aur Vada Hunda Te Mainu Kisi Or Da Lund Lain Di Zarurat Nahi Si“

28.



Class Mein Ek Nayi Ladki Aayi To Pappu Ka Tharki Mann Mein Usko Patane Ka Khayal Aya Vo Us Ladki Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola Pappu: “Agar Tum 1 Minute Mein Apna Weight 500grams Kam Kar Do To, Tum Bahut Hi Jyada Sunder Aur Sexy Lagogi, Aur Main Tumhe Pyar Bhi Karunga” Ladki Khush Hoke Boli: “Achha, Iske Liye Mujhe Kya Karna Hoga?” Pappu: “Bas Apne Kapde Utaar Do“

29.



Banta Bhaaga-Bhaaga Santa Ke Ghar Aaya Aur Khushi Se Bola.
Banta: “Oye Santa, Aaj TV Pe Rakhi Sawant, Apne 38-Inch Ke Boobs Dikhane Wali Hai” Santa Udaas Hokar Bola: “Achha, Par Main Nahi Dekh Paunga” Banta: “Kyu?” Santa: “Mera TV To Sirf 21-Inch Ka Hai?“

30.



Santa Fixed His Marriage On 2nd March.
He Sent Invitation To His Friends: “Marriage Is On March 2nd But Please Come On 1st Night We All Will Enjoy.“