🤣 Desi Jokes Reloaded – Sabse Mazedaar Chutkule – 02

1.



Santa Ne Apne Sath Wale Padosi Se Ek Din Puchha Santa: “Ek Baat Bata Yaar, Kya 48 Saal Ke Baad Aurat Ko Bachha Ho Sakta Hai?” Padosi: “Nahi Yaar Ye To Bahut Hi Mushkil Hai” Santa: “To Yaar Apni Biwi Ko Samjha Na, Ese Hi Faltu Mein Condom Ka Kharcha Karvati Hai“

2.



सूहागरात का सबसे बड़ा झटका : सुहागरात की तैयारी हो चुकी हो और पत्नी पति से बोली :कंडोम सिर्फ़ कोहिनूर ही लेना, बाकी से मुझे एलर्जी हो जाती हे.

3.



Santa Apne Padosi Ke Ghar Mithayi Ka Dibba Lekkar Jata Hai.
Santa: “Le Mithayi Kha, Meri Biwi Ko Call-Center Mein Promotion Mil Gayi Hai” Padosi: “Arrey Wah, To Ab Vo Kya Ban Gayi Hai?” Santa: “Wahan Ki Best Call-Girl“

4.



A Girl After Taking Santa’s Dick In Her Mouth: “1000 Nikal Warna Kaat Lungi” Santa: “500 Mujhe De Warna Peshaab Kar Donga“

5.



Santa Ka Baap Santa Ko Apni Marzi Se Shaadi Karne Ke Liye Gusse Se Bolta Hai.
Santa Ka Baap: “Tune Iss Ladki Mein Kya Dekha Jo Iss Ladki Se Shaadi Kar Li.” Santa: “Daddy, Ye Bachpan Mein Angootha Bohat Achha Choosti Thi.”

6.



Santa Ki Wife TV Dekh Rahi Hoti Hai Toh Santa Usko Kehta Hai.
Santa: “Kya Din Raat Cooking Show Dekhti Rehti Hai?” Wife: “Aap Chup Hi Raho To Achha Hoga, Aapko Kya” Santa: “Arrey, Fir Bhi Tujhe Khana Banana Toh Aata Hi Nahi Hai” Wife: “Aur Aap Bhi Toh Din Raat Blue Film Dekhte Rehte Ho, Maine Kuch Kaha?“

7.



Pappu Ne Apne Baap Santa Ki Tambaku Ki Dibbiya Pe “Chut” Likh Diya.
Santa: “Abbe Sale Yeh Kya Likh Diya Hai” Pappu: “Arey Papa, Yeh Toh Mene Aapki Suvidha Ke Liye Likha Hai, Jidhar ‘Chu’ Hai Udhar Chuna Hai Aur Jidhar ‘T’ Hai Udhar Tambaku“

8.



Santa: “Bante, Daily Chyavanprash Khane Se Chusti Rehti Hai.” Banta Hairani Se: “Sach Mein, Mujhe Bhi Bata Na Kon Chusti Rahti Hai? Bata Na Bhai, Bata Na.” Santa: “Abbey! Chusti Rahti Hai, Chusti Yani Fitness” Sale, Ye To Hai Hi Gande Dimaag Ka, Aap To Ye Nahi Soch Rahe The Na.

9.



Santa Ko Ek Din Hichki Aayi Aur Sath Mein Uska Lund Bhi Khada Ho Gaya Santa: “Arrey Wah Lagta Hai Balbir Bhai Ke Saath Babhi Bhi Yaad Kar Rahi Hai”

10.



Santa Apne Doodh Wale Se Ladte Hue Bola Santa: “Yaar Tum Do Din Se Doodh Dene Kyun Nahi Aa Rahe Thhe??” Doodhwala Udai Se Bola: “Sardar Ji, Aap Ki Bhabhi Ki Tabiyat Kharab Thhi, Isliye Nahi Aa Paya” Santa Kuch Soche Ke Bola: “To Koi Baat Nahi! Bhains Ka Doodh Hi Le Aate!“

11.



College Mein Ek Professor Bhooto Ke Baare Mein Bachhon Ko Lecture De Raha Tha, Aur Hall Mein Keval Ladke Hi Aaye Hue The.
Lecture Ke Beech Mein Professor Ne Puchha: “Kitne Bachhe Bhoot Mein Yakeen Karte Hai?” Kareeb 50 Bachho Ke Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Bahut Achhe, Ab Ye Batao Ki Kitne Logo Ne Bhoot Ko Dekha Hai?” Lagbag 20 Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Bahut Achhe, Achha Ab Ye Baatao Ki Bhoot Ko Kitne Logo Ne Bahut Kareeb Se Dekha Hai?” Lagbhag 5 Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Shabash, Achha Ab Ye Batao Kitne Logon Ne Bhoot Ko Chooma Hai?” Keval Ek Ladke Ka Haath Khada Hua Aur Wo Apna Pappu Tha.
Professor: “Maine Aaj Tak Khud Nahi Suna Ki Kisi Ne Aisa Kiya Ho, Aap Idhar Mere Paas Stage Par Aa Jaao” Pappu Uth Kar Professor Ke Paas Chala Gaya.
Professor: “To Aapka Kahna Hai Ki Aapne Bhoot Ko Chooma Hai, Jara Baat Puri Detail Mein Batao” Pappu: “Ohh Sorry Sir, Maine Choot Suna Tha“

12.



Kutta Kutti Ko Sadak Par Chod Raha Tha Ek Sardarni Ne Dekha To Uska Bhi Mann Karne Laga Sardarni Ne Sardar Ko Bade Romantic Mood Mein Kaha: “Aji Suno, Aap Bhi Aisi Karo Na” Sardar Bola: “Main To Tyaar Hun Tum Kutti Se Pooch Lo Kahi Use Na Koi Aitraz Ho“

13.



Santa Murga Kharidne Gaya Santa: “Murge Kitne Rs Ke Hai?” Murgewala: “70, 50 Aur 10 Rs Ka” Santa: “10 Rs Ka Itna Sasta Kyu?” Murgewala: “Isko Aids Hai” Santa: “Yehi De De, Maine Khana Hi Hai Kaunsa Gaand Maarni Hai“

14.



Class Mein Ek Shararti Bache Ne Apni Teacher Se Poocha Johnny: “Miss Ye Bus Male Hai Ya Female?” Teacher Sochne Lagi Itne Mein Santa Bola: “Bus Female Hai” Johnny: “Kyun?” Santa: “Kyunki Sab Uspar Piche Se Chadte Hai” Teacher Bechari Pareshan Ho Gayi Johnny: “Agar Bus Female Hai To Uske Bache Kyu Nahi Hote?” Santa: “Kyunki Sab Uspar Piche Se Chadte Hai” Teacher Bechari Sharam Se Paani Paani Hogayi Johnny: “Mana Sab Piche Se Chadte Hai, Par Driver Aur Conductor To Aage Se Hi Chadte Hai, Fir Bache Kyu Nahi Hote” Teacher Ki Saansein Band Santa: “Kyunki Dono Topi Laga Ke Chadte Hai” Teacher Behosh

15.



Santa In Kaun Banega Carorpati Amitab Bhachan: “”Sardar Ji What Is The Colour Of Your Wife’s Bra” A: White B: Black C: Red D: Pink Santa: “Can I Call A Friend?“

16.



Santa College Ki Side Wali Sadak Ke Kinare Susu Kar Raha Thha Ek Ladki Vaha Se Gujar Rahi Thhi Usne Santa Ka Bada Lund Dekha Aur Boli Ladki: “Wow, Mujhe Bhi Chahiye” Santa Bola: “Abe To Dekh Kya Rahi Hai, Jaldi Se Ek Cup Le Aa, Susu Khatam Hone Wala Hai“

17.



Santa Ka USA Ka Visa Laga To Vo First Class Flight Se USA Jaa Raha Thha Plane Mein Ek Badi Hi Hot And Sexy Air Hostess Aayi Aur Santa Se Boli Air Hostess: “Sir, What Would You Like?” Santa: “I Would Like To Hug And Kiss You, Wanna Play With Your Boobs And Squeez Your Nipples And Run My Hands In Your Skirt, Put My Fingers In Your Pussy And Take You To Bed And Then Fuck You For Full Day” But What I Need Now Is Only A Pizza.
Bechari Air Hostesss Uska Muh Khulla Ka Khulla Hi Rah Gaya..

18.



Santa Aur Uski Patni Bed Pe Lete Sex Se Related Baatein Kar Rahe Thhe Patni: “Aapne Mere Boobs Chus Chus Ke Bade Kar Diye Hai” Santa Hairan Hote Hue: “Abe Sali, Esa Agar Hota To Mera Lund Mere Ghutne Tak Pahunch Gaya Hota Or Mujhe Condom Ki Jagha Cycle Ki Tube Lagani Padti“

19.



Teacher Class Mein: ” Bachho Koi Batayega Ki New and Old Mariage Mein Kya Farak Hota Hai?” Pappu: “Madam Ji, New Marriage Main Log Lips Mila Ke Sotay Hai Aur Old Marriage Main Hips“

20.



Santa Aur Uska Freind Apas Mein Baatein Kar Rahe Thhe Santa: “Oye, Tujhe Pata Hai Kal Raat Mene Party Mein Ek Ladki Ko Rape Hone Se Bachaya.” Dost Hairani Se: “Sachh Mein, Wah Bhai Wah Par Kaise?” Santa: “Self Control, Yaar Self Control“

21.



Santa Apni Suhaag Raat Mein Apni Biwi Preeto Ki Chut Mein Ungli Daalta Hai.
Preeto Gusse Se Bhadakti Hue Boli “Abe Oye, Mere Paas Khud Ki 10 Ungliyan Hai, Maine Ungli Dalwaane Ke Liye Shaadi Nahi Ki Hai.”

22.



Santa Ki Wife TV Dekh Rahi Hoti Hai Toh Santa Usko Kehta Hai.
Santa: “Kya Din Raat Cooking Show Dekhti Rehti Hai?” Wife: “Aap Chup Hi Raho To Achha Hoga, Aapko Kya” Santa: “Arrey, Fir Bhi Tujhe Khana Banana Toh Aata Hi Nahi Hai” Wife: “Aur Aap Bhi Toh Din Raat Blue Film Dekhte Rehte Ho, Maine Kuch Kaha?“

23.



Goverment Ne Elaan Kiya Ki Jiske 5 Ya Usse Jyada Bachhe Hai, Usko Rahne Ko Ek Ghar Free Mein Degi.
Santa Ke 3 Bachhe Thhe Usne Apji Wife Ko Kaha Santa: “Sachayi Ye Hai Ki Hamare Padosi Sharma Ji Ke 2 Bachhe Mere Hai, Mein Unko Leke Aata Hun, Kam Se Kam Ghar To Free Mein Mil Jayega” Santa Dono Bachhe Le Aaya Aur Ghar Aake Dekha, To Uske 3 Bachhe Nahi Hai Santa: “Hamare Teeno Bachhe Kidhar Hai?” Wife: “Vo Jinke Thhe Vo Vapis Le Gaye“

24.



वासना, प्यार और शादी में क्या फ़र्क है ? संता : वासना मे पेंटी को फाड़ते हैं, प्यार मे उतारते हैं, और शादी मे धोकर सुखाकर अलमारी मे रखते हैं.

25.



Santa Ke College Time Mein Uski Ek Premika Santa Ko Bade Pyar Se Boli.
Premika: “Darling, Shaadi Ke Baad Tum Mujhe Subha Se Lekar Shaam Tak, Shaam Se Lekar Subha Tak Pyaar Karna” Santa Hairani Se: “Abe Sali, To Fir Main Tatti Kab Karunga?“

26.



Class Me Baithi Ladki Ki Bra Ka Hook “Tak” Ki Awaj Ke Sath Tut Gaya.
Teacher Ne Pucha: “Arey Kya Hua?, Ye Awaaj Kaisi Thi?” Ladki Ke Piche Baitha Pappu Ek Dum Se Bola “Madam, Do Panchi Pinjra Todkar Azad Ho Gaye, Pakad Lu Kya?”

27.



Santa Banta Ek Din Park Mein Bethe The To Achanak Se Santa Ek Ladko Ko Dekh Ke Bola.
Santa: “Yaar Bantya, Wo Ladki Kitni Sundar Hai” Banta: “Mujhe Uska Naam Pata Hai” Santa Hairani Se: “Achha Kya Naam Hai Uska?” Banta: “Wo Bank Mein Kaam Karti Hai, Uske Counter Ke Upar Uska Naam Likha Tha… Chaalu Khaata“

28.



Santa Subah Subha Doctor Ke Paas Jata Hai Aur Rote Hue Bolta Hai.
Santa: “Dr, Saab Badi Tension Hai, Kal Raat Ladki Ke Saath Sex Kiya Thha Aur Aaj Peshab Hi Nahi Aa Raha Hai” Doctor Ne Check Kiya Aur Gusse Se Bola Doctor: “Bhosdi Ke Pehle Lund Pe Se Condom To Utar Le“

29.



Ajakal Ke Time Mein Ladkiya Bewafa Kyu Hoti Hai, Aur Biwiya Apne Mard Ko Chhod Kar Dusre Mardo Ke Piche Kyu Bhagti Hai.
Is Cheez Par Research Karke Hamare Pujniye Baba Saxidas Ji Ne Ek Slogan Banaya Hai.
Rozana Muth Marne Se Parhez Kariye, Yaad Rakhein Ke Lund Jaandar To Mard Shaandar,

30.



Class Mein New Teacher Aayi, Jiske Blouse Pe Phool Laga Hua Thha.
Kuch Der Baad Usne Samne Bethe Pappu Se Pucha.
Teacher: “Batao Beta, Phool Kya Peete Hai?” Pappu: “Ji Mam, Doodh” Teacher Ne Pyar Se Samjhate Hue Kaha: “Nahi Beta, Paani Peete Hai” Pappu Sochte Hue: “Ji Mam Sorry, Mujhe Pata Nahi Thha Iski Dandi Itni Niche Tak Hai“