😂 Hasne ka Time! Top 50 Funny Hindi Jokes in Hinglish – 01

1.



Ek Baar Ek Sardaar Apni Patni Ke Boobs Pakad Kar Bola: “Darling Je Tere Boobs Thodhe Hor Sakhat Hunde Ta Tainu Bra Paaun Di Zarurat Nahi Si” Patni Ne V Sardaar Da Lund Fadd Ke Keya: “Je Tera V Lund Thoda Aur Vada Hunda Te Mainu Kisi Or Da Lund Lain Di Zarurat Nahi Si“

2.



लड़की :- मुझे बड़ी ठंड लग रही है, मेरे दोनो हीटर को छु लो! लड़का:- अभी भी ठंड लग रही है क्या? लड़की:- अबे घोन्चु, नीचे प्लग तो लगा.!

3.



Santa Banta Ek Sath Sadak Ke Ja Rahe Thhe To Santa Ne Sunder Si Ladki Ko Dekh Kar Kaha: “Wah!! What A Breast” Banta Bola: “Yaar Breast To Yaad Aya Babhi Da Ki Haai Hai?“

4.



Santa Banta Se: “Muje Shak Hai Meri Biwi Ki Panty Tere Bedroom Mein Hai?” Banta: “Par Gadhe, Bhabhi Panty Kaha Pehnti Hai?” Santa: “Are Haan, Sorry Yaar Maine Tujhpe Vese Hi Shak Kiya“

5.



Why Did English Teacher Slapped Santa For His Doubtful Question? Because Santa Asked: “Why Is “Bra” Singular When It Covers Two” And “Panties” Plural When It Cover Only One“

6.



Santa Ek Din Bada Khush Sa Hoke Ghar Aya Aur Apne Baap Ko Bola.
Santa: “Daddy Daddy, Mera Lund Class Mein Sabse Bada Hai, Esa Mere Mein Kya Khas Hai?” Santa Ka Baap Gusse Se Bola.
Daddy: “Bhonsdi Ke, Kyunki Tu 18 Saal Ka Ho Gaya Hai Aur Abhi Bhi 5th Class Mein Hai“

7.



Banta Ek Baar Beemar Hua To Santa Uska Pata Lene Gaya Dekha Banta Bed Pe Leta Hua Thha Aur Halat Thik Nahi Thhi Santa: “Yaar Sharam Ki Baat Hai, Tera Daddy Dr.
Hai Fir Bhi Tu Beemar Ho Gaya” Banta Ye Baat Sunkar Gusse Mein Aa Gaya Aur Bola Banta: “Bhonsdi Ke, Tere Baap Ki Bhi Condom Ki Factory Hai, Aur Tu Phir Bhi Paida Ho Gaya“

8.



Sardar Ji School Mein Apne Ladke Ka Report Card Lene Jate Hai Sardar: “Madam Ji Kab Dengi Aap” Madam Bade Pyar Se Boli: “Sardar Ji Period Khatam Hone Tak To Intezar Kar Lo Na.
Fir De Dungi“

9.



Santa Made Lot Of Money In USA.
Banta Asked: “How?” Santa: “I Made A Cream, When Applied On Penis, It Smells Like Banana and Was A Hit.” Banta Also Went To USA and Made 5 Times Money Than Santa.
Santa Asked: “How?” Banta: “I Also Developed A Cream, When Applied On Banana, It Smells Like Penis“

10.



Santa Ko Ek Din Hichki Aayi Aur Sath Mein Uska Lund Bhi Khada Ho Gaya Santa: “Arrey Wah Lagta Hai Balbir Bhai Ke Saath Babhi Bhi Yaad Kar Rahi Hai”

11.



Santa Badi Buri Halat Mein Ghar Aya Sab Ne Pucha: “Kya Hua?” Santa: “Mandi Mein Anaaj Bech Raha Thha Ye Kah Ke Gehoon-Le-Lo” Gharwale: “Fir?” Santa: “Sab Ne Samjha Gay-Hun-Le-Lo, Aur Unhone Meri Mill Ke Li“

12.



Santa Truck Driver Thha Ek Din Sharab Pee Ke Ghar Aya Aur Apni Biwi Ki Panty Mein Hath Dalkar Pucha Santa: “Ye Rasta Kidhar Jata Hai?“ Biwi Ne Uska Lund Pakadkar Kaha: “Is Se Pucho Isko Pata Hoga, Ye Roj Up Down Karta Hai.“

13.



Teacher Class Mein: “Bachho, Jimmedari Pe Ek Sentance Banao” Santa: “Madam Ji, Agar Apke Blause Ke 4 Me Se 3 Batan Tut Jaye To Sari Jimmedari Sirf Ek Batan Par Hogi.“

14.



Baba Saxidas Ki Kitab Anmol Gottiya Vol.
1 Mein Se Unka Ek Vachan Apni Biwi Ko Apni 100%1$ Kamayi Dene Se 10%2$ Sukh Milta Hai Aur Girlfrnd Ko Apni Kamayi Ka 10%3$ Dene Se 100%4$ Sukh Milta Hai.
Paisa Apka, Faisla Apka Jago Grahak Jago

15.



Doctor Returns To His Clinic After A Day Off And Asks His Assistant Santa About His Patients.
Santa: “1st Patient Came With Headache.
I Gave Him Saridon.” Doctor: “Good Job.” Santa: “2nd With Running Nose And I Gave Him Coldarin.” Doctor: “Good Job Again!” Santa: “3rd Patient Was A Lady.
She Took-Off Her Clothes On The Bed, Opened Her Legs And Said, “help Me, I Have Not Seen A Man For Last 5 Months”.
Surprised Doctor: “What Did You Do Then?” Santa: “I Put Ciplox Eye Drops In Her Eyes”

16.



College Mein Ek Professor Bhooto Ke Baare Mein Bachhon Ko Lecture De Raha Tha, Aur Hall Mein Keval Ladke Hi Aaye Hue The.
Lecture Ke Beech Mein Professor Ne Puchha: “Kitne Bachhe Bhoot Mein Yakeen Karte Hai?” Kareeb 50 Bachho Ke Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Bahut Achhe, Ab Ye Batao Ki Kitne Logo Ne Bhoot Ko Dekha Hai?” Lagbag 20 Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Bahut Achhe, Achha Ab Ye Baatao Ki Bhoot Ko Kitne Logo Ne Bahut Kareeb Se Dekha Hai?” Lagbhag 5 Haath Khade Ho Gaye.
Professor: “Shabash, Achha Ab Ye Batao Kitne Logon Ne Bhoot Ko Chooma Hai?” Keval Ek Ladke Ka Haath Khada Hua Aur Wo Apna Pappu Tha.
Professor: “Maine Aaj Tak Khud Nahi Suna Ki Kisi Ne Aisa Kiya Ho, Aap Idhar Mere Paas Stage Par Aa Jaao” Pappu Uth Kar Professor Ke Paas Chala Gaya.
Professor: “To Aapka Kahna Hai Ki Aapne Bhoot Ko Chooma Hai, Jara Baat Puri Detail Mein Batao” Pappu: “Ohh Sorry Sir, Maine Choot Suna Tha“

17.



,बच्चे का फुल टिकेट लगेगा.
औरत:- यह तो अभी निपल्स चूसता है.
कंडक्टर:- ,वो तो इसका बाप भी चूसता है, तो क्या उसका भी आधा लेगी?

18.



Pappu Ka Sex Karne Ka Mood Bana To Girlfriend Ko Fon Kiya Aur Bola Pappu: “Chalo Gulli Danda Khelte Hai?” Ladki: “Nahi Teen Din Baad” Pappu: “Kyuu?” Ladki: “Pitch Geeli Hai Tum Chaho To Volley Ball Khel Sakte Ho.“

19.



After Sex Girl Apne Boyfriend Pappu Se Puchti Hai.
Girl: “Jaanu Tum Mujhse Shaadi Kab Karoge?” Pappu: “Darling, Do Idli Aur Ek Medu Wada Ke Liye, Koi Pura Hotel Kharidta Hai Kya?“

20.



Santa Ki Shaadi Hui Aur Wo Suhagraat Ko Apni Biwi Preeto Ki Chut Mein Apna Lund Ghusane Ki Koshish Kar Raha Tha, Magar Lund Tha Ki Ghus Hi Nahi Raha Tha, To Santa Ne Preeto Se Puchha.
Santa: “Iss Se Pahle Kisi Ne Tumhari Li Nahi Kya?” Preeto: “Li Bahuto Ne Li, Lekin Jab Bhi Li Sabne Chaddi Utaar Ke Li“

21.



Santa In Kaun Banega Carorpati Amitab Bhachan: “”Sardar Ji What Is The Colour Of Your Wife’s Bra” A: White B: Black C: Red D: Pink Santa: “Can I Call A Friend?“

22.



Biwi Ke Kuch Dino Se Mayake Mein Hone Ki Wajah Se Santa Ko Badi Tharki Chadi Hui Thi.
To Tang Aake Kothe Pe Gaya.
Waha Dalal Ne Sabhi Cgs Ke Nam Car Ke Namo Pe Rakhe Hue The.
Dalal: “Kon Si Chahiye” “Honda Civic Rs 10000, Ford Figo Rs 8000, Hundai i10 Rs 6000, Maruti Alto Rs 4000, Tata Nano Rs 500.” Santa Ne Kaam Hi Chalana Tha To Paise Bachane Ke Liye Bola Santa: “Nano Hi Laa Do” Dalal Thodi Der Baad Ek Hijde Ko Lekar Aa Gaya Ye Dekhte Hi Santa Gusse Se Laal Peela Hote Hue Bola.
Santa: “Abe Sale Ye Kya Hai?” Dalal Muskurate Hue: “Sir Nano Ka Engine Pichhe Hota Hai“

23.



Santa (B.Com) Saw A Poster At A Police Station: “Two Engineers Wanted For Rape” Santa: “Shit Man, These Engineers Always Get The Best Jobs“

24.



What Do Santa and Banta Says To Each Other If They Share The Same Girl? Ans: “Assi Tussi Same Pussy, Kabhi Tu Ghussy, Kabhi Mein Ghussy.”

25.



Santa: “Dr.
Sahab I Am Suffering From Loose Motions” Doctor: “Kitni Patli Aati Hai??” Santa: “Samajh Lo Ki Aap Usse Gargle Kar Sakte Ho“

26.



Santa Ek Khubsurat Ladki Se Santa: “Chalo Sex Karte Hain” Ladki: “Sorry I Am A Lesbian” Santa: “Lesbian?? Ye Kya Hota Hai” Ladki: “Matlab Main Bas Ladkio K Saath Sex Karti Hoon” Santa: “De Taali!! I Am Lesbian Too, Main Bhi Sirf Ladkiyo Se Hi Sex Karta Hun“

27.



Koi Bhi Kunwari Ladki Savecha Se Apni Choot Nahi Deti, Usko Majbur Kar Diya Jata Hai, Chahe Pyar Ka Natak Karke Karo Ya Usko Koi Aur Lalach Dekar.
Aurto Ke Liye Baba Saxidas Ji Ka Ek Mahan Naara, Tum Mujhe Choot Do Main Tumhe Bacha Dunga, Par Hairani Is Bat Ki Hai India Ki Aurte Fir Bhi Jagruk Nahi Hai Aur Bache Ke Liye Tadpati Hai.

28.



Santa Ke Daddy Ji Ke Kisse Pad Ke Aapko Pata Chal Jayega Ki Hamare Bechare Santa Ka Koi Dosh Nahi Hai Jo Vo Esi Harkate Karta Hai.
Jaisa Baap Vesa Beta To Hoga Hi Na Ek Din Santa Ne Bade Dukhi Mann Se Apne Baap Ko Dukhda Sunaya.
Santa: “Papa, Mene Biwi Ko S.M.S Kiya Ke Main Aaj Raat Ko Ghar Pahunch Jaunga” Ghanta Singh: “Firr??” Santa: “Main Ghar Aaya To Wo Kisi Aur Ke Sath Bister Pe Thi” Ghanta Singh Kuch Sochte Hue: “Beta, Dil Chhota Na Kar Sms Nahi Mila Hoga“

29.



Santa Roz-Roz Office Ki Canteen Ka Khana Kha Kar Bore Ho Chuka Tha, Aaj Uska Man Ghar Ja Kar Apni Biwi Ke Hath Ka Khana Khane Ko Kar Raha Tha, Santa Bin Bataye Ghar Aaya To Usne Dekha Ki Biwi Palang Par Nangi Leti Hui Hai, Pasina Nikal Raha Hai Aur Saans Fool Rahi Hai.
Santa Ne Apni Patni Se Pucha: “Kya Hua?“ Biwi: “Dil Gabra Raha Hai, Jaldi Se Doctor Ko Bulao“ Santa Doctor Ko Bulane Bhaga To Pappu Ne Darwaje Par Santa Ko Roka Aur Bola.
Pappu: “Papa, Chachu Bed Ke Niche Nange Chupe Hai“ Santa Wapis Aaya, Bed Ke Niche Dekha Aur Apne Bhai Ko Nikal Kar Gusse Se Bola.
Santa: “Bhosdi Ke, Teri Bhabhi Ko Heart Attack Aaya Hai Aur Tu Nanga Ho Ke Bed Ke Niche Chupa Hai Saale“

30.



Santa Ek Khubsurat Ladki Se Santa: “Chalo Sex Karte Hain” Ladki: “Sorry I Am A Lesbian” Santa: “Lesbian?? Ye Kya Hota Hai” Ladki: “Matlab Main Bas Ladkio K Saath Sex Karti Hoon” Santa: “De Taali!! I Am Lesbian Too, Main Bhi Sirf Ladkiyo Se Hi Sex Karta Hun“