🤪 Ek Joke Jo Aap 5 Logon Ko Zaroor Bhejhoge – 08

1.



माँ :- बेटी अब तुम 16 साल की हो गई हो.
वक़्त आ गया है सेक्स के बारे मैं जानने का..
बेटी:- जी अम्मी.
“पूछें क्या पूछना है”.

2.



Santa: “Madam, How Do Babies Come In To The World?” Teacher: “In The Moonlight Angels Come and Leave The Baby In A Mother’s Lap” Santa: “You Mean Fucking Is Useless“

3.



Banta Ek Baar Beemar Hua To Santa Uska Pata Lene Gaya Dekha Banta Bed Pe Leta Hua Thha Aur Halat Thik Nahi Thhi Santa: “Yaar Sharam Ki Baat Hai, Tera Daddy Dr.
Hai Fir Bhi Tu Beemar Ho Gaya” Banta Ye Baat Sunkar Gusse Mein Aa Gaya Aur Bola Banta: “Bhonsdi Ke, Tere Baap Ki Bhi Condom Ki Factory Hai, Aur Tu Phir Bhi Paida Ho Gaya“

4.



Santa Ne Pakistan Mein Exam Diya Aur Use Fansi Ki Saza Suna Di Gayi.
Kyu? Kyuki Uske Exam Mein Sawal Tha Ki Musharaf Kab Paida Hua? Santa Ne Answer Diya Tha “Jab Uski Maan Chudi“

5.



Santa Apni Gharwali Ke Sath Bus Mein Apne Mayake Ja Raha Thha Santa Ki Biwi Uske Kaan Mein Boli: “Suno Ji, Piche Wala Mere Bra Mein Hath Dal Raha Hai” Santa Hass Ke Bola: “Dalne De, Tu Chinta Na Kar Tera Purse Mere Pass Hai“

6.



Ek Baar Ek Sardaar Apni Patni Ke Boobs Pakad Kar Bola: “Darling Je Tere Boobs Thodhe Hor Sakhat Hunde Ta Tainu Bra Paaun Di Zarurat Nahi Si” Patni Ne V Sardaar Da Lund Fadd Ke Keya: “Je Tera V Lund Thoda Aur Vada Hunda Te Mainu Kisi Or Da Lund Lain Di Zarurat Nahi Si“

7.



Goverment Ne Elaan Kiya Ki Jiske 5 Ya Usse Jyada Bachhe Hai, Usko Rahne Ko Ek Ghar Free Mein Degi.
Santa Ke 3 Bachhe Thhe Usne Apji Wife Ko Kaha Santa: “Sachayi Ye Hai Ki Hamare Padosi Sharma Ji Ke 2 Bachhe Mere Hai, Mein Unko Leke Aata Hun, Kam Se Kam Ghar To Free Mein Mil Jayega” Santa Dono Bachhe Le Aaya Aur Ghar Aake Dekha, To Uske 3 Bachhe Nahi Hai Santa: “Hamare Teeno Bachhe Kidhar Hai?” Wife: “Vo Jinke Thhe Vo Vapis Le Gaye“

8.



Pappu Asked His Girl-Friend Pappu: “Between Me And The Toilet, Who Do You Love Most?” Girl-Friend: “Obviously Its You, Why Do You Ask Such A Stupid Question?” Pappu: “Because You Drop Your Pants So Fast For The Toilet, But For Me, I Have To Really Struggle“

9.



Santa Ek Bar Apna Blood Test Karvane Hospital Gaya.
Nurse Ne Uski Finger Mein Se Blood Leke Finger Ko Muh Mein Dal Liya Do Min Baad Santa Khada Hoke Dance Karne Lag Gaya Nurse Ne Muh Mein Se Ungli Nikal Ke Pucha: “Dance Kyu Kar Rahe Ho?” Santa: “Oye Kudiye, Agla Test Urine Ka Hai“

10.



Santa Ke Ghar Jab Pappu Hua To Uski Kunwari Saali Kuch Din Rahne Ke Liye Uske Ghar Aayi Ek Din Santa Ne Apni Sali Ko Bola: “Teri Didi Busy Hai, Tu Pappu Ko Doodh Hi Pila De” Sali Hairan Hokar: “Jija Ji, Mere Ko To Doodh Hi Nahi Aata” Santa Bhi Hairan Ho Gaya: “Kamal Hai, Display To Bahut Bhari Hai Aur Stock Kuch Bhi Nahi?“

11.



Santa Apni Suhaag Raat Mein Apni Biwi Preeto Ki Chut Mein Ungli Daalta Hai.
Preeto Gusse Se Bhadakti Hue Boli “Abe Oye, Mere Paas Khud Ki 10 Ungliyan Hai, Maine Ungli Dalwaane Ke Liye Shaadi Nahi Ki Hai.”

12.



Santa Ne Apni Biwi Ko Ape Ek Dost Ke Sath Sote Dekh Liya.
Usne Aav Dekha Na Taav Bandook Uthayi Aur Dost Ko Goli Maar Di.
Biwi Ne Ye Dekha Aur Gusse Mein Aake Boli.
Biwi: “Tum Apne Gusse Pe Kaabu Rakho, Warna Ek Din Apne Sare Dosto Se Haath Dho Bethoge“

13.



Ek Baar Ek Sardaar Apni Patni Ke Boobs Pakad Kar Bola: “Darling Je Tere Boobs Thodhe Hor Sakhat Hunde Ta Tainu Bra Paaun Di Zarurat Nahi Si” Patni Ne V Sardaar Da Lund Fadd Ke Keya: “Je Tera V Lund Thoda Aur Vada Hunda Te Mainu Kisi Or Da Lund Lain Di Zarurat Nahi Si“

14.



Class Mein Teacher Bachho Se Puchti Hai Teacher: “Agar Sincerely Ki Jaye To Is Duniya Mein Sabse Mushkil Job Kiski Hai?” Pappu: “Madam Ji, Blue Film Ke Cameraman Ki“

15.



Teacher Santa Se: “Use The Word Harassment In A Sentence” Santa: “When I Was In School With Her, Her-Ass-Meant A Lot To Me“

16.



Banta Bhaaga-Bhaaga Santa Ke Ghar Aaya Aur Khushi Se Bola.
Banta: “Oye Santa, Aaj TV Pe Rakhi Sawant, Apne 38-Inch Ke Boobs Dikhane Wali Hai” Santa Udaas Hokar Bola: “Achha, Par Main Nahi Dekh Paunga” Banta: “Kyu?” Santa: “Mera TV To Sirf 21-Inch Ka Hai?“

17.



Santa Ek Bar Interview Dene Gaya Boss: “What’s Your Wife Name?” Santa: “Sir, Preeto” Boss: “What’s Her Whole Name?” Santa Sochte Hue: “Sir, Hole Ka Naam To Rakha Nahi, Par Main Pyar Se Fuddi Kehta Hoon“

18.



Santa Ko Uske Ek Dost Ne Bataya Ki Sex Karne Ke Baad 72 Gante Ke Ander Ipill Kha Li Jaye To Bachha Nahi Hota.
Santa Ne Yahi Tarika Apnaya Aur Uski Biwi Pregnant Ho Gayi.
Santa Rota Hua Apne Dsot Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola Santa: “Sale Kutte Kameene Mujhe Marva Diya, Tune To Kaha Tha Ki Bachha Nahi Hoga” Dost Hairan Hua: “Yaar Impossible Hai, Esa Nahi Ho Sakta” Santa: “Abe Ho Gaya Na, Tune To 72 Gante Kaha Thha, Mene To Sax Ke 3 Gante Ke Baad Hi Ipill Kha Li Thhi, Fir Bhi Pata Nahi Kaisi Ho Gaya“

19.



Do Ladkiya Gajar Choot Mein Dal Ke Hila Rahi Thhi Santa: “Kya Kar Rahi Ho?” Girl: “Maje Le Rahi Hai, Aao Hume Join Karo” Santa: “Ok, Wait Main Abhi Gajar Le Ke Aata Hun“

20.



Pappu Ke Dost Golu Ne Ek Din Us Se Puchha Golu: “Yaar Ek Baat To Bata, Ye School Male Hota Hai Ya Female?” Pappu Kuch Soch Kar Bola: “Yaar Ye To Mujhe Khud Aaj Tak Nahi Samajh Aaya, Kyunki Ismein Ghanta Bhi Hota Hai Aur Periods Bhi“

21.



Pappu Jab 4 Month Ka Ho Gaya Tha To Ek Din Santa Ne Apni Biwi Preeto Se Puchha Santa: “Tum Pappu Ko Kya Pilati Ho?” Preeto: “Doodh Aur Orange Juice” Santa Ye Sun Kar Hawa Mein Uchhla Aur Biwi Se Bola Santa: “Oye, Tune Kabhi Bataya Nahi Ki Orange Juice Kis Side Se Aata Hai?“

22.



Santa Badi Buri Halat Mein Ghar Aya Sab Ne Pucha: “Kya Hua?” Santa: “Mandi Mein Anaaj Bech Raha Thha Ye Kah Ke Gehoon-Le-Lo” Gharwale: “Fir?” Santa: “Sab Ne Samjha Gay-Hun-Le-Lo, Aur Unhone Meri Mill Ke Li“

23.



Santa Ek Bar Interview Dene Gaya Boss: “What’s Your Wife Name?” Santa: “Sir, Preeto” Boss: “What’s Her Whole Name?” Santa Sochte Hue: “Sir, Hole Ka Naam To Rakha Nahi, Par Main Pyar Se Fuddi Kehta Hoon“

24.



एक लड़की की पैट्रोल डालने वाले से शादी हो गई..
दुल्हन की सहेलिया: सुहागरात कैसी रही? दुल्हन: बेवकूफ सारी रात हाथ में लेकर घूमता रहा..
और बार-बार पूछता रहा कितना डालू

25.



Santa Ne Apna Underwear Dhoya Aur Chatt Pe Gaya Sath Wali Padosan Ki Panty Sukh Rahi Thhi Usne Uske Saath Apna Underwear Taanga Uspar Ek Note Likh Diya Aur Khud Chala Gaya “Babhi Please Mera Underwear Bhi Utar Lena Jab Aap Apni Panty Utaaro“

26.



Bade Dino Baad Mall Mein Ex Girlfriend Pappu Ko Mili To Usne Pucha “Bahut Dino Baad Mile Ho, Kaisa Hai Aajkal?” Pappu: “Jeans Utar Ke Dekh Le Kaisa Hai Aajkal Pata Lag Jayega”

27.



Pappu Ke Pados Mein Ek Nayi Familly Rahne Aayi, Ek Din Uski Ladki Ne T–Shirt Pahni Hui Thhi Jispe Car Bani Hui Thi.
Papu Lagatar Usko Dekhe Ja Raha Thha, Ladki Ne Us Se Pucha.
Ladki: “Oye, Kabhi Car Nahi Dekhi Kya?” Papu: “Ji, Car To Dekhi Hai, Par Itne Bade-Bade Speed Breaker Kabhi Nahi Dekhe“

28.



After Sex Girl Apne Boyfriend Pappu Se Puchti Hai.
Girl: “Jaanu Tum Mujhse Shaadi Kab Karoge?” Pappu: “Darling, Do Idli Aur Ek Medu Wada Ke Liye, Koi Pura Hotel Kharidta Hai Kya?“

29.



Kutta Kutti Ko Sadak Par Chod Raha Tha Ek Sardarni Ne Dekha To Uska Bhi Mann Karne Laga Sardarni Ne Sardar Ko Bade Romantic Mood Mein Kaha: “Aji Suno, Aap Bhi Aisi Karo Na” Sardar Bola: “Main To Tyaar Hun Tum Kutti Se Pooch Lo Kahi Use Na Koi Aitraz Ho“

30.



Ladki Ki Jeans Ki Pant Khulli Thhi Aur Usne Panty Nahi Pahan Rakhi Thhi Pappu Dekh Ke Bola: “Aapke Lower Lips Dikh Rahe Hai” Ladki: “Mujhe Pata Hai Beta, Ye To Ciggerate Peena Chahte Hai“