😜 Husband Wife Ki Nok-Jhok Wale Mazedaar Jokes – 05

1.



Santa Ka USA Ka Visa Laga To Vo First Class Flight Se USA Jaa Raha Thha Plane Mein Ek Badi Hi Hot And Sexy Air Hostess Aayi Aur Santa Se Boli Air Hostess: “Sir, What Would You Like?” Santa: “I Would Like To Hug And Kiss You, Wanna Play With Your Boobs And Squeez Your Nipples And Run My Hands In Your Skirt, Put My Fingers In Your Pussy And Take You To Bed And Then Fuck You For Full Day” But What I Need Now Is Only A Pizza.
Bechari Air Hostesss Uska Muh Khulla Ka Khulla Hi Rah Gaya..

2.



Baba Saxidas Se Unke Ek Bhakt Ne Pucha
Bhakt: “Baba Ladkiya Hamesha Phoolon Wali Panty Hi Kyu Pahnti Hai?”
Baba Saxidas: “Bacha Simple,
Taki Choot Se Badbu Na Aaye“

3.



What Do Santa and Banta Says To Each Other If They Share The Same Girl? Ans: “Assi Tussi Same Pussy, Kabhi Tu Ghussy, Kabhi Mein Ghussy.”

4.



Santa Mobile Shop Ke Bahar Khada Mobile Dekh Raha Tha.
Andar Se Salesman Ne Smile Dete Hue Awaj Lagayi Salesman: “Please Come Inside and Choose” Santa Gusse Se: “Bhosadi Ke Tu Bahar Aa Aur Mera Choos…!!!!!”

5.



Pappu Ne Gali Mein Jati Hui Ladki Ko Ungli Kardi.
Ladki: “Andha Hai Kya, Dikhta Nahi Hai” Pappu: “Kyu Kya Hua, Sahi Jagah Nahi Gusi Kya?“

6.



Santa Apni Suhaag Raat Mein Apni Biwi Preeto Ki Chut Mein Ungli Daalta Hai.
Preeto Gusse Se Bhadakti Hue Boli “Abe Oye, Mere Paas Khud Ki 10 Ungliyan Hai, Maine Ungli Dalwaane Ke Liye Shaadi Nahi Ki Hai.”

7.



Santa Nu Bleeding Ho Rahi Si Banta Ne Puchhya: “Ki Hoya?” Santa: “Jaggu Ne Mainu Hathoda (Hammer) Marya” Banta: “Tere Hath Vich Kuch Nahi Si?” Santa: “Haan, Hai Si” Banta: “Ki?” Santa: “Usdi Biwi De Boobs“

8.



Santa Ki Shadi Hui Aur Wo Bahut Dino Baad Apne Suhaagraat Waale Kamre Se Bahar Nikla, To Usske Baap Ne Us Se Pucha Baap: “Beta, Kya Baat Hai Badi Lambi Inning Khel Kar Aaya Hai?” Santa: “Maa Chuda Gayi Duniya, Pahle Ye Batao Ki Andar Tel Ki Botal Ki Jagah Fevikol Kon Rakh Kar Aaya Tha“

9.



Santa Banta Ek Din Film Se Related Baat Kar Rahe The To Achanak Se Santa Ne Banta Se Puchha.
Santa: “Deepa Mehta Ne Ek Film Lesbeens Par Banayi Naam Rakha Fire Ab Wo Gay Ke Upar Film Bana Rahi Hai Socho Uska Naam Kya Hoga?” Banta: “Pata Nahi” Santa: “Backfire“

10.



Santa Bechare Ko Loose Motions Lage Hue Thhe, Aur Vo Bada Pareshan Thha Jaisi Taise Karke Vo Ek Doctor Ke Pass Gaya.
Ab Problem Ye Thhi Ki Vo Doctor Ko Bataye Kaisi, Itne Mein Uski Baari Aa Gayi Doctor: “What Is Your Problem?” Santa Kuch Sochte Hue: “Free Outgoing With Variety Of Ring Tones“

11.



Santa Apne Bete Pappu Se Bola Santa: “Agar Apni Girlfriend Se Pehli Mulakat Mein Agar Tujko Su-Su Jana Ho To Kya Kahega?” Pappu: “Daddy Bolunga Ke Ek Special Dost Se Haath Milane Ja Raha Hu, Jisse Teri Mulakaat Bahut Hi Jaldi Karvaunga Aur Tu Us Se Milkar Bahut Khush Hogi“

12.



Santa Plane Mein Air Hostess Ko Dekhe Ja Raha Thha.
Air Hostess Ki Left Breast Pe Name Plate Lagi Thhi, Aur Uspar Likha Tha, Teena.
Santa Ne Ye Dekh Kar Air Hostess Se Pucha.
Santa: “Waah Ji Bahut Badiya Naam Rakha Hai, Dosre Wale Ka Kya Hai?“

13.



Santa Bechare Ko Loose Motions Lage Hue Thhe, Aur Vo Bada Pareshan Thha Jaisi Taise Karke Vo Ek Doctor Ke Pass Gaya.
Ab Problem Ye Thhi Ki Vo Doctor Ko Bataye Kaisi, Itne Mein Uski Baari Aa Gayi Doctor: “What Is Your Problem?” Santa Kuch Sochte Hue: “Free Outgoing With Variety Of Ring Tones“

14.



Santa Ek Ladki Ke Saath Sex Kar Raha Tha Achanak Hi Santa Ne Pucha.
Santa To Girl: “Do U Have Aids?” Girl: “No” Santa: “Bhagwan Ka Shukar Hai, Main Nahi Chahta Ki Mujhe Dobara Aids Ho Jaye.“

15.



Salim: Anarkali,CAN I HAVE SEX WITH U? Anarkali: Aapne bahut badi cheez maang li jahanpanah.
Salim: Agar woh cheez bahut badi ho chuki ho, toh phir rehne do..

16.



Ek Din Santa Ne Banta Se Puchha: “Oye Ek Baat Bata, Ladki Aur Bijli Ki Taar Mein Kya Farak Hai?” Banta: “Yaar Jyada Farak Nahi Hai, Dono Nangi Ho To Jaan Nikal Deti Hain.”

17.



Pappu Santa Se: “Daddy Aap To Chutiya Ho” Santa Hairani Se: “Kyu Be?” Pappu: “Aaj Jab Aap Bahar Gaye Thhe To Mummy Uncle Se Kah Rahi Thhi Ki Jaldi Karo Wo Chutiya Aane Wala Hai“

18.



Pappu Se Uski Girlfriend Ne Masti Ke Mood Mein Puchha.
Ladki: “Sex Ke Pehle Chut Kaisi Dikhti Hai?” Pappu: “Jaise Gulaab” Ladki: “Aur Sex Ke Baad?” Pappu: “Sardar Ji Ke Muh Ki Tarha Jisne Thodi Der Pehle Lassi Pi Ho“

19.



Santa Was Sitting In His House Without Pagdi On Head And Banta Comes To Meet Him Banta Shocked: “Oye Santa Tune Baal Katwa Diye?” Santa With Shame: “Haan Yaar, Bahut Hairfall Ho Raha Tha.” Banta Shouts: “Hair Fall Ho Raha Tha To Baal Katwa Diye, Phir To Acha Hua Tujhe Nightfall Nahi Hua Warna Tu To Pata Nahi Kya-Kya Katwa Deta.“

20.



Pappu Ke Pados Mein Ek Nayi Familly Rahne Aayi, Ek Din Uski Ladki Ne T–Shirt Pahni Hui Thhi Jispe Car Bani Hui Thi.
Papu Lagatar Usko Dekhe Ja Raha Thha, Ladki Ne Us Se Pucha.
Ladki: “Oye, Kabhi Car Nahi Dekhi Kya?” Papu: “Ji, Car To Dekhi Hai, Par Itne Bade-Bade Speed Breaker Kabhi Nahi Dekhe“

21.



Do Ladkiya Gajar Choot Mein Dal Ke Hila Rahi Thhi Santa: “Kya Kar Rahi Ho?” Girl: “Maje Le Rahi Hai, Aao Hume Join Karo” Santa: “Ok, Wait Main Abhi Gajar Le Ke Aata Hun“

22.



Teacher Santa Se: “Jab Main Padati Hun To Tum Apne Sir Mein Tel (Oil) Kyu Lagane Lag Jaate Ho?” Santa: “Kal Raat Mummy Daddy Ko Kah Rahi Thhi Ki Agar Andar Nahi Jaa Raha To Tel Laga Lo“

23.



Santa Ek Bar Interview Dene Gaya Boss: “What’s Your Wife Name?” Santa: “Sir, Preeto” Boss: “What’s Her Whole Name?” Santa Sochte Hue: “Sir, Hole Ka Naam To Rakha Nahi, Par Main Pyar Se Fuddi Kehta Hoon“

24.



Santa Ne Apni Biwi Ko Ape Ek Dost Ke Sath Sote Dekh Liya.
Usne Aav Dekha Na Taav Bandook Uthayi Aur Dost Ko Goli Maar Di.
Biwi Ne Ye Dekha Aur Gusse Mein Aake Boli.
Biwi: “Tum Apne Gusse Pe Kaabu Rakho, Warna Ek Din Apne Sare Dosto Se Haath Dho Bethoge“

25.



Santa Bade Pareshan Haal Mein Apne Familly Doctor Ke Pass Gaya Santa: “Dr.
Saab, Mene Hamesha Apni Biwi Se Condom Laga Ke Sex Kiya Hai Fir Bhi Uske 3 Bachhe Ho Gaye” Dr Hairan Ho Ke: “Achha?? Kamal Hai Yaar.
Vese Tum Condom Lagate Kaisi Ho” Santa: “Jitna Condom Lund Pe Chadta Hai, Utna Chada Ke Baki Ka Aage Se Kaat Deta Hun“

26.



Banta Bhaaga-Bhaaga Santa Ke Ghar Aaya Aur Khushi Se Bola.
Banta: “Oye Santa, Aaj TV Pe Rakhi Sawant, Apne 38-Inch Ke Boobs Dikhane Wali Hai” Santa Udaas Hokar Bola: “Achha, Par Main Nahi Dekh Paunga” Banta: “Kyu?” Santa: “Mera TV To Sirf 21-Inch Ka Hai?“

27.



Ek Baar Santa Bike Rok Kar Helmet Khuja Raha Tha.
Ek Aadmi Ne Dekha Aur Hairan Hokar Puucha.
Aadmi: “Helmet Utaar Ke Khujao” Santa: “Chup Be, Jab Teri Gand Pe Khujli Hoti Hai To Kya Pent Utaar Ke Khujata Hai“

28.



Pappu Jab Chota Thha To, Kisi Baat Pe Ghar Se Maar Khakar Gusse Mein School Ja Raha Tha Raste Mein Ek Aadmi Ne Pucha: “Beta Padhne Ja Rahe Ho?” Pappu Gusse Se: “Jab Aap Chhote Thhe To School Dress Mein Kya Gaand Marvane Jaate The?“

29.



Santa Banta Ek Din Film Se Related Baat Kar Rahe The To Achanak Se Santa Ne Banta Se Puchha.
Santa: “Deepa Mehta Ne Ek Film Lesbeens Par Banayi Naam Rakha Fire Ab Wo Gay Ke Upar Film Bana Rahi Hai Socho Uska Naam Kya Hoga?” Banta: “Pata Nahi” Santa: “Backfire“

30.



Baba Saxidas Ki Kitab Anmol Gottiya Vol.
1 Mein Se Unka Ek Vachan Apni Biwi Ko Apni 100%1$ Kamayi Dene Se 10%2$ Sukh Milta Hai Aur Girlfrnd Ko Apni Kamayi Ka 10%3$ Dene Se 100%4$ Sukh Milta Hai.
Paisa Apka, Faisla Apka Jago Grahak Jago